Page 1 of 3

Magic items to stay away from...

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 5:06 pm
by Aylstra Illianniis
In the spirit of Inrii's Spells not to bother memorizing thread, I present to you this- Magic items that you REALLY don't want!! (In no particular order)

* Boots of Blinding Speed- (These were inspired by an actual item in Morrowwind) These make you go really fast. Unfortunately, they are cursed to make the wearer go blind....

* Ring of No-Armor- This ring is supposed to protect the wearer, but it has such confidence in it power, that it will not let you wear any armor!

* Prismatic Brassiere- Never worry about groping hands in a tavern again.... Often comes as a set with the Prismatic Panties.

* Staff of the Mage-Eye- Nothing special, just has a wizard's eye on top that watches everything....

* Spiked Gauntlets- This pair of fine steel gauntlets has spikes- on the INSIDE.

* Stop Watch- It freezes the owner in place.

* Bag of Coin-Devouring- 'Nuff said....

* Cloak of Invisibility- This cloak can never be found....

* Musical Chair- You sit on it, and it lets out a Bronx cheer.

* Decanter of Endless Butter- (borrowed from Nodwick) Never run out of hot butter for your popcorn!

* Disappearing Ink- with this magical ink, you'll never have to worry about running out of paper- you can't see what you wrote anyway!

* Magic Broom and Bucket- Usually found by the dozen- and once activated, there is no command to stop!!

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 8:27 pm
by Kiaransalyn
Don't forget the Head of Vecna.

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 8:33 pm
by Aylstra Illianniis
Which one?! :p :devil: Actually, I'm mostly talking about non-artifact items here. But feel free to add any new ones!

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 9:20 pm
by Kiaransalyn
[url=http://www.blindpanic.com/humor/vecna.htm:131vfnq0]Head of Vecna[/url:131vfnq0]

But I'm sure it's well-known to all. :)

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 9:44 pm
by Aylstra Illianniis
OMFG!!! That's so funny! I could not have run that one without laughing and giving it all away...

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 10:15 pm
by veraka
Oh, and I feel compelled to add the ever fearful Helm of Gender Change.

Posted: Fri Aug 06, 2010 11:22 pm
by Aramil Galanodel
I've ran into the Orb of Swarms: Chihuawas.

Posted: Sat Aug 07, 2010 7:34 am
by Kiaransalyn
I used to mock drow power-gamers (Drizzt wannabes) by saying they had a Cock Ring of Lightning Orgasm, worn on the nose.

Posted: Sat Aug 07, 2010 9:19 am
by Rhei Lor'akris
~ The Blunt Rock of Sharpness.

Posted: Sat Aug 07, 2010 11:36 am
by Kiaransalyn
Out-house insignia - a magic insignia that gives you access to the toilet.

Sword of Healing - immediately heals any wounds it causes.

Belt of Holding - prevents your trousers from falling down.

Posted: Sat Aug 07, 2010 12:32 pm
by Rhei Lor'akris
Tattoo of the Bottomless Belly: This tattoo worn on the belly causes the wearer to become a fearsome devourer. Caution, if not fed constantly, the side effect consumes the wearer and everything around it in a 5 ft. radius until the tattoo itself is destroyed in the process.

Posted: Sat Aug 07, 2010 2:54 pm
by Kiaransalyn
Psionic tattoo - If tattoo is worn on the lower spine, it makes NPCs think you're a porn star.

Facial Piercing of Plenty - Once the PC wears this piercing they feel compelled to wear another, and another. In the end the PC has so many piercings their face becomes a construct.

Posted: Sun Aug 08, 2010 1:27 am
by Aylstra Illianniis
* Ring of Spell "Turning"- When activated, this ring says "Turning: T-U-R-N-I-N-G, Turning" and then the spell hits the wearer full-force.... (Note, this one is from the 2nd ed Encyclopedia Magica, along with its companion ring the Ring of Spell "Storing"!)

* Horn of Bubbles- This is one of my personal faves from that book set; when played, it blows bubbles out that blind and daze enemies in a cone up to ten ft. However, it has a 20% chance of sucking the player in and blowing them back out as bubbles, which pop within 1d2 rounds!

Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 5:00 am
by Cipherof3vil
Ring of Misspell-
(Knowledge Arcana)
DC: 15, This powerful ring has the power to completely reshape magic!
DC: 20, This powerful ring has the power to turn the most useless of spells into spells so effective, you'll never want for another!
DC: 30, This horrid ring allows the using spellcaster to amplify his or her powers, however it has horrible linguistics and will change that "Alter Self" spell into "Altar Self" or "Bestow Curse" to "Bestow Purse". changing effects accordingly.

Posted: Mon May 09, 2011 5:39 am
by Aylstra Illianniis
Then there is my other favorite, the Flute of Puppies! When played it turns 1d8 HD worth of creatures who hear it and fail their saving throw vs spell into young dogs. Breed and size may change according to the size category of the original creature. Thus one can end up with anything from chihuawas to golden retrievers or even a pyranese,