Magic items to stay away from...

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Aylstra Illianniis
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Magic items to stay away from...

Post by Aylstra Illianniis » Fri Aug 06, 2010 5:06 pm

In the spirit of Inrii's Spells not to bother memorizing thread, I present to you this- Magic items that you REALLY don't want!! (In no particular order)

* Boots of Blinding Speed- (These were inspired by an actual item in Morrowwind) These make you go really fast. Unfortunately, they are cursed to make the wearer go blind....

* Ring of No-Armor- This ring is supposed to protect the wearer, but it has such confidence in it power, that it will not let you wear any armor!

* Prismatic Brassiere- Never worry about groping hands in a tavern again.... Often comes as a set with the Prismatic Panties.

* Staff of the Mage-Eye- Nothing special, just has a wizard's eye on top that watches everything....

* Spiked Gauntlets- This pair of fine steel gauntlets has spikes- on the INSIDE.

* Stop Watch- It freezes the owner in place.

* Bag of Coin-Devouring- 'Nuff said....

* Cloak of Invisibility- This cloak can never be found....

* Musical Chair- You sit on it, and it lets out a Bronx cheer.

* Decanter of Endless Butter- (borrowed from Nodwick) Never run out of hot butter for your popcorn!

* Disappearing Ink- with this magical ink, you'll never have to worry about running out of paper- you can't see what you wrote anyway!

* Magic Broom and Bucket- Usually found by the dozen- and once activated, there is no command to stop!!
By the Dark Maiden''s grace do we meet. May she guide and protect us.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins." -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

A link to my tales, including my Marvel hero!:
http://mickeys-tavern.com/index.php?showforum=188

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Kiaransalyn
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Post by Kiaransalyn » Fri Aug 06, 2010 8:27 pm

Don't forget the Head of Vecna.

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Aylstra Illianniis
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Post by Aylstra Illianniis » Fri Aug 06, 2010 8:33 pm

Which one?! :p :devil: Actually, I'm mostly talking about non-artifact items here. But feel free to add any new ones!
By the Dark Maiden''s grace do we meet. May she guide and protect us.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins." -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

A link to my tales, including my Marvel hero!:
http://mickeys-tavern.com/index.php?showforum=188

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Kiaransalyn
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Post by Kiaransalyn » Fri Aug 06, 2010 9:20 pm

[url=http://www.blindpanic.com/humor/vecna.htm:131vfnq0]Head of Vecna[/url:131vfnq0]

But I'm sure it's well-known to all. :)

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Aylstra Illianniis
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Post by Aylstra Illianniis » Fri Aug 06, 2010 9:44 pm

OMFG!!! That's so funny! I could not have run that one without laughing and giving it all away...
By the Dark Maiden''s grace do we meet. May she guide and protect us.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins." -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

A link to my tales, including my Marvel hero!:
http://mickeys-tavern.com/index.php?showforum=188

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veraka
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Post by veraka » Fri Aug 06, 2010 10:15 pm

Oh, and I feel compelled to add the ever fearful Helm of Gender Change.
In War, Justice; In Peace, Hope; In Death: Sacrifice
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Veraka

Onix

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Aramil Galanodel
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Post by Aramil Galanodel » Fri Aug 06, 2010 11:22 pm

I've ran into the Orb of Swarms: Chihuawas.

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Kiaransalyn
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Post by Kiaransalyn » Sat Aug 07, 2010 7:34 am

I used to mock drow power-gamers (Drizzt wannabes) by saying they had a Cock Ring of Lightning Orgasm, worn on the nose.

Rhei Lor'akris
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Post by Rhei Lor'akris » Sat Aug 07, 2010 9:19 am

~ The Blunt Rock of Sharpness.

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Kiaransalyn
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Post by Kiaransalyn » Sat Aug 07, 2010 11:36 am

Out-house insignia - a magic insignia that gives you access to the toilet.

Sword of Healing - immediately heals any wounds it causes.

Belt of Holding - prevents your trousers from falling down.

Rhei Lor'akris
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Post by Rhei Lor'akris » Sat Aug 07, 2010 12:32 pm

Tattoo of the Bottomless Belly: This tattoo worn on the belly causes the wearer to become a fearsome devourer. Caution, if not fed constantly, the side effect consumes the wearer and everything around it in a 5 ft. radius until the tattoo itself is destroyed in the process.

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Kiaransalyn
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Post by Kiaransalyn » Sat Aug 07, 2010 2:54 pm

Psionic tattoo - If tattoo is worn on the lower spine, it makes NPCs think you're a porn star.

Facial Piercing of Plenty - Once the PC wears this piercing they feel compelled to wear another, and another. In the end the PC has so many piercings their face becomes a construct.

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Aylstra Illianniis
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Post by Aylstra Illianniis » Sun Aug 08, 2010 1:27 am

* Ring of Spell "Turning"- When activated, this ring says "Turning: T-U-R-N-I-N-G, Turning" and then the spell hits the wearer full-force.... (Note, this one is from the 2nd ed Encyclopedia Magica, along with its companion ring the Ring of Spell "Storing"!)

* Horn of Bubbles- This is one of my personal faves from that book set; when played, it blows bubbles out that blind and daze enemies in a cone up to ten ft. However, it has a 20% chance of sucking the player in and blowing them back out as bubbles, which pop within 1d2 rounds!
By the Dark Maiden''s grace do we meet. May she guide and protect us.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins." -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

A link to my tales, including my Marvel hero!:
http://mickeys-tavern.com/index.php?showforum=188

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Cipherof3vil
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Post by Cipherof3vil » Mon May 09, 2011 5:00 am

Ring of Misspell-
(Knowledge Arcana)
DC: 15, This powerful ring has the power to completely reshape magic!
DC: 20, This powerful ring has the power to turn the most useless of spells into spells so effective, you'll never want for another!
DC: 30, This horrid ring allows the using spellcaster to amplify his or her powers, however it has horrible linguistics and will change that "Alter Self" spell into "Altar Self" or "Bestow Curse" to "Bestow Purse". changing effects accordingly.

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Aylstra Illianniis
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Post by Aylstra Illianniis » Mon May 09, 2011 5:39 am

Then there is my other favorite, the Flute of Puppies! When played it turns 1d8 HD worth of creatures who hear it and fail their saving throw vs spell into young dogs. Breed and size may change according to the size category of the original creature. Thus one can end up with anything from chihuawas to golden retrievers or even a pyranese,
By the Dark Maiden''s grace do we meet. May she guide and protect us.

"Where Science ends, Magic begins." -Spiral, Uncanny X-Men #491

A link to my tales, including my Marvel hero!:
http://mickeys-tavern.com/index.php?showforum=188

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