Spells not worth memorizing

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

A[/size:23zluq60]

# Acid Trip
# Affect Abnormal Fires
# Affect Normal Foyers
# Air Breathing (land-dwellers only)
# Airshape (like Stoneshape, but with normal air)
# Airy Air
# Alamir's Freeway Breakdown
# Alamir's Fundamental Theorem
# Algorithm I-III
# Anger God
# Animate Bread
# Anti-Anti-Magic Shell (Pro-Magic Shell?)
# Anti-Magic Eggshell
# Anti-Magic Magic Missle
# Anti-Magic Magic Mouth
# Antipathy Orb
# Audible Hammer (of the M.C. variety)
# Auditable Glamour
# Augmented Chord 1,2,3,4,5,6

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

B[/size:2drn2ak9]

# Bad Lighting
# Badly Programmed Illusion
# Become Dead (reverse of Resurrect Self)
# Bigby's Assertive Finger
# Bigby's Clenched Teeth
# Bigby's Critically Fumbling Hand
# Bigby's Glove (colors the various Bigby's Hand spells, no bonus)
# Bigby's Groping Hand
# Bigby's Hairy-Palmed Hand
# Bigby's Insulting Hand (the second finger is rather prominent)
# Bigby's Limp-Wristed Hand
# Bigby's Shadow-Animal Making Hands
# Bigby's "Shush"ing Hand
# Black & White Spray
# Blind Self
# Bold Monster
# Bookworm Blast
# Break-Wind Wall
# Break the Wind
# Bubbling Rainstorm
# Burning Hands (Yours, ouch)

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

# Can Trip (And does!)
# Change Elf
# Charm Dead
# Charm Friends
# Charm Groupie
# Charm Potted Plants
# Charm Self
# Charm Undead (X rated version)
# Cheeseball
# Circling the Square (i.e. Times, Trafalger, Tiannemen)
# Clause of the Lawyer
# Clear Audience (usually follows Delayed Blast Flatulence)
# Clone Undead
# Clown
# Color Safe Spray
# Compulsive Disorder
# Cone of Bubbles
# Conjure Emmenthaler
# Contact This Plane
# Continual Bad Lighting
# Continual Right (a political spell)
# Control Casting Time (controls the casting time of this spell only)
# Control Feather
# Copyright Shroud
# Crass Suggestion
# Create Coat Hanger
# Cure Animal Hide
# Cure Light Winds
# Cure Smoked Ham
# Cure STD
# Current Life
# Cylons, 10' Radius
# Cymbal

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

#

D
# Dalamar's Whoopee Cushion (things that make you go hmmmm)
# Darkness, 15 micron radius
# Daylight (material components: must be cast outdoors in bright sunlight)
# Deathwish
# Deeppocket Lint
# Delayed Blast Cantrip
# Delayed Blast Flatulence
# Delayed Blast Spitball
# Demand Blindness
# Demi-Shadow Puppets
# Deny Reality
# Detect Crying
# Detect Dead (Yep, he's dead alright...)
# Detect Detect Spells
# Detect Hound
# Detect Lightning Bolts (area: 5')
# Detect Pervert
# Detect Pink Bunny Rabbits
# Detect Self (allows you to see if you are yourself)
# Detect Strikes and Spares
# Detect Tragic (oooh, theres a sad happening over there!)
# Detect Unseen Butler
# Detect Visibility (Yep, I can see that)
# Detect Weevil
# Detect Wind
# Differentiate Without Error (Hey, you never know...)
# Dimension Doorknob
# Dispell Nonmagical Reptiles & Amphibians
# Dispurse Self
# Drain Vaccuum
# Draw Upon Religious Right
# Drawmij's Court Summons
# Drawmij's Instant Cake Mix
# Drawmij's Instant Coffee (components: hot water and cup)
# Drawmij's Instant Death (Drawmij's CON must be about -30 by now...)

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

#

E
# Earthly Chorus
# Enchanted Toothpick
# Enlightening Bolt
# Enrage Dragon
# ESPN
# Ethertalk
# Evard's Black Growth (range: 0)
# Evard's Black Testicles
# Evard's Blue Testicles
# Explosive Familiar (it's *your* familiar)
# Explosive Friends
# Extension Cord I, II, and III
# Extinguish Match (casting time: 5 rounds)

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

#

F
# Face Grasp
# Fear of Sunmotes
# Feather Brain
# Feather Flail
# Feign Life (as if the caster has one)
# Feign Orgasm
# Find Acquaintance
# Find Floor (somatic component: falling on face)
# Find Hand
# Finger of Near-Fatal Injury
# Finger of Plead
# Fire Alarm
# Fire Rap
# Fire Stick
# Fireball (reversed)
# Fiscal Projection
# Fist of Flesh
# Fleshskin (range: self)
# Fool's Lead
# Foresee Unseen Butler
# Forget Spells (area: self)
# Forehead
# Foreskin
# Fourier's Transformation
# Furball
# Furry Fire

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

#

G
# Gaze at Reflection
# Geese
# Get Flu
# Get Life
# Glassteal (swipe that beermug from that unsuspecting peasant)
# Globe of Vulnerability
# Grate
# Graze reflection (if someone hurts your knee)
# Guess Alignment

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

((ok, im bored with doing this by letter, heres the rest))

#

H
# Hair Extension I, II, III
# Hallucinatory Escape
# Hallucinatory Train
# Hand of Skin
# Hatch Egg (somatic component: sit on egg)
# Heal Monster (only works on opponents during combat)
# Heel
# Hold Bladder
# Hold Mustard
# Hold Self
# Hornung's Gas
# Hornung's Police Dispatcher
# Housefly
# Hug Self

I
# Illusion Debugger (for Badly Programmed Illusions)
# Illusionary Crypt
# Iggy's Invisible Illusion
# Illegal Thoughts (That serving wench looks older than 18)
# Implosive Runes
# Impress Plants
# Improper Suggestion
# Indirection (address register postincrement)
# Indivisibility (The caster is a prime number)
# Insect Plague, 5' Radius
# Integrate (reversible, Differentiate)
# Invisibility to Inanimate Objects
# Invisibility to Dead
# Invisible Talker
# Irritate Self

K
# Kender Summoning I, II, III
# Kitchen Sink
# Knock Knock
# Know Own Alignment
# Know Person (in the biblical sense of the word...)
# Kooshball

L
# Legend Bore
# Legend Lore, Extended Dance Mix
# Leomund's Condemned Shelter
# Leomund's Grass Hut
# Leomund's Mortgaged Shelter
# Leomund's Risky Tax Shelter
# Leomund's Secure Chest Cavity
# Leomund's Sturdy Music Box
# Leomund's Tap
# Leomund's Underfunded Homeless Shelter
# Level Water
# Lightning Blot
# Limited Dish (Sorry sir, the Dover Sole is off)
# Limited Wash
# Locate Right Hand
# Locate Self (tells you where you are, relative to your location)
# Locate Tongue (requires verbal component)
# Locate Wizard (the _nearest_ wizard)
# Lorloveim's Shady Deal
# Lose Familiar (Get lost, ya wee booger!)
# Lower Cholesterol Level
# Lower Inhibitions

M
# Maggot Missle
# Magic Boomeranging Missile
# Magic Gristle
# Magic Jar-Jar
# Magic Missal (A really boring prayersheet)
# Magic Moth
# Magic Orifice
# Magic Shotglass (as opposed to Magic Jar)
# Mail of the Banshee (victim gets letter saying "Waaaaaahh...")
# Maize
# Matrix Addition
# Mauve Earth
# Meld, Canasta Version
# Melf's Acid Bow
# Melf's Acid Trip
# Melf's Minute Rice
# Melodramatic Phantom Defenders
# Memorize Spell
# Meteor Swan
# Micrometeorite Storm
# Mildly Surprising Grasp
# Minor Delousing
# Mistaken Identify
# Mistaken Thought (Gee, guys, it _looked_ like a Gas Spore)
# Moaning Spirit
# Mordenkainen's Agnostic Hound
# Mordenkainen's Aroused Hound (can't get it off of the nearest leg)
# Mordenkainen's Big Ears (+1 to all hearing checks, ear size quadrupled)
# Mordenkainen's Bored Cat
# Mordenkainen's Celery
# Mordenkainen's Conjunction (Conjunction Junction, what's your function?)
# Mordenkainen's Faithful Mosquito
# Mordenkainen's Freeway Junction
# Mordenkainen's Lubrication
# Mordenkainen's Sword, -1 Backbiter
# Mordenkainen's Unfaithful Wife
# Move Venus
# Muenster Summoning I-VII
# Murder Darkness
# Murdoch's Featherless Fryer (Verbal component: "Butterball")
# Murdock's Feathery Pillow

N
# Nahal's Banana Peel (appears under random ally's foot)
# No Time
# No Vacancy
# Nystul's Undetectible Aura

O
# Otiluke's Happy Fun Sphere
# Otiluke's Resilient Ear
# Otiluke's Room Temperature Sphere
# Otto's Irresistible Disco-Duck
# Otto's Resistable Dance

P
# Paraphrase Magic
# Part Hair
# Pastel Blade of Warm Fuzzies (9th level Drow spell)
# Penultimate Fall
# Phantasmal Fork
# Phantasmal Morse
# Phantasmal Thriller
# Plane XOR
# Polymorph Mother
# Power Word Missing
# Power Word, NO!
# Power Word, Noogie
# Power Word, Puke
# Power Word, Pun
# Power Word, Smirk
# Power Word, Spam
# Power Word, Wedgie
# Protection from Catnips
# Protection from Elvis, 10' Radius
# Protection from Evil Knievel
# Protection from Halitosis
# Protection from Normal Air
# Protection from Normal Missals
# Protection from Normal Oxygen
# Protection from Normal Pillows
# Protection from Self
# Protection from Weevil
# Psychoanalyze Without Error (Zo, ven dit you shtop lofink your mutter?)
# Purge Memory
# Putrefy Offal

R
# Rainbow Enhancer
# Random Casualty
# Rary's Mnemonic Cancer (eats away at those favorite spells)
# Rary's Mnemonic Device (makes silly acronyms out of things)
# Rary's Pneumonic Cough (range: self)
# Read Common
# Rectum of Retention
# Reincarnation Door
# Remove Hand (yours)
# Remove Minus Sign (reversible)
# Remove Nurse ("Good-Byyyeeee Nurse!")
# Remove Reality
# Remove Self
# Remove Strong Language
# Reservation
# Rest Erection
# Resurrect Living
# Resurrect Self (problem: must be alive to cast the spell)
# Reverse Graffiti
# Rice Storm
# Rock Summoning I

S
# Sepia Cake Sigil
# Serten's Smell Immunity
# Sheepskin
# Shocking Gasp (usually follows Tenser's Shocking Suggestion)
# Silence of the Lambs, 15' radius
# Sleep with Dead (yuck... unless you're a real Necromancer)
# SmorgasMorph
# Soap-on-a-Rope Trick
# Solid Frog
# Speak With Boring Monsters
# Speak With Dead Plants
# Speak With Grateful Dead
# Speak With Living (components: two tin cans and a string)
# Speak With Mud
# Speak With Self
# Sucker (for those of you who actually cast the spell)
# Summon Allergy
# Summon Death (Death arrives and kills the caster)
# Summon Self
# Swift Envelope

T
# Tape Mount
# Tasha's Controllable Mildly Unpleasant Laughter
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Bladder
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Hideous Die Rolls
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Hideous Flatulence
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Hideous Gesture
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Hideous Hand
# Tax Avoidance
# Taunt a Second Time
# Teleport Environment
# Teleport With Lots of Errors
# Teleport Without Destination
# Teleport Without Terror
# Tenser's Double-Sided, Double Density Disk
# Tenser's Floating Point
# Tenser's Formatted Disk
# Tenser's Gloating Disk
# Tenser's Shocking Suggestion (you want to WHAT??!)
# Tenser's Slipped Disk
# Tenser's Deadly Resurrection
# Tensor Transformations
# This Space for Rent (fills up space on a scroll or in a mage's memory)
# Time Start
# Tonguetwister Change
# Tons
# Transmute Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust (priest spell)
# Transmute Friends to Enemies
# Transmute Head to Butt
# Transmute RGB to HSV
# Transmute Rock to Stone (reversible)
# Transmute Rock to Jazz
# Trap the Sole (see Limited Dish)
# Turn Friends Into Enemies
# Turn Pebble (rotation, not banishment)

U
# Undefined Symbol
# Unenlightening Bolt
# Unheard Servant
# Unscented Cloud
# Unseen Manservant
# Unseen Pervert
# Unseen Sympathy

V
# Vampiric Breathing (perfect for harassing phone calls)
# Vampiric Crutch
# Varnish
# Visible Stalker

W
# Walk
# Wall of Dog
# Wall of Horse
# Wall of Non-Dairy Creamer
# Wall of Normal Air
# Wall of Paper
# Wall of Velcro
# Waste
# Wink
# Wizard Eyebrow
# Wizard Lick
# Wizard Nostril
# Wizard Stain

Y
# You Wish!

Z
# ZX-Spectral Force

[Luashalee Mizrym]

I dunno, some of these might be fun at parties! XD

[Kiaransalyn]

[quote="Inriiaynrae Jaelre":3b36oiy3]
# Melf's Acid Trip
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Bladder
# Tasha's Uncontrollable Hideous Flatulence
# Unseen Pervert
[/quote:3b36oiy3]

The above are probably all worth memorising at some point. I'd think they'd be great for getting rid of goblins or low level opponents.

And what mage wouldn't think about casting Unseen Pervert if Sune's clergy were parading nearby?

[Bergeth'fryn]

Not to mention Tax Avoidance

[Aylstra Illianniis]

Power Word : Wedgie, Power Word: Noogie, and Power Word: Puke, and Hold Bladder might all be useful, too. I liked Dalamar's Whoopie Cushion, too. Now I know why he's called "the Dark"!! Detect Pervert might be handy for attractive female casters....

[veraka]

[quote="Aylstra Illianniis":vdu659zf]Detect Pervert might be handy for attractive female casters....[/quote:vdu659zf]

Yeah, either that or just a really big sword

[Inriiaynrae Jaelre]

im so learning that one!

[Ra'Sona Races-The-Wind]

I used to have one I mentioned from Sailor Moon (Yes I watched Sailor Moon a few times).

Death Reborn DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION!

It's rather cool.

EDIT: And my primary character on another site has [i:16av51tv]power word: pie.[/i:16av51tv] He casts it, pie happens to you. No saving throws.